« Home | Words That Are Hard To Rhyme » | Redundant Phrases » | Shotgun Rules » | Types of Crap » | Commercials I Hate » | Ways To Pay Your Rent » | Spartans » | Ways To Resolve An Argument » | Things That Annoy The Wench About Our Neighbours » | Reasons I Think I'm Getting Old » 

Tuesday, May 08, 2007 

Top 5 Reasons To Hate David Caruso

Oh, David Caruso, how do I hate thee? Let me count the ways. It's been a long relationship, for many seasons of CSI:Miami I didn't realise what you were doing. It didn't occur to me to actually pay attention to you. I was blinded by the greatness of the Vegas series, and eventually the New York incarnation.

I can remember the exact moment it happened. It was like a switch being flicked in my head. I thought to myself: "You're SHIT!!". The next thing I know I recognised every cheesy line, every time you moved your glasses, your hero complex, and finally the fact that you're ONLY A CSI. You're not in SWAT, you shouldn't clear a house on your own, or lead in a team of heavily armed and armoured policemen into a criminal's home. You should be sitting outside, with the other CSIs, waiting for the scene to be cleared. You're a twat, and it's time people knew.

1. Now watch this video...
2. ...and again...
3. ...and again...
4. ...and again...
5. ...and again!!!

Does that not just grate on every nerve? Does his smug, ginger face not make you want to go to work on him with a blowtorch, cordless drill and 10Kg bag of salt? His acting is like a toddler pretending to cry. He even uses his 'acting voice' like small children in school plays, who think they have to show that they're acting. If you could see my hatred for David Caruso, it would drive you insane, like seeing all of existence in a single blink.

By now you should all understand. After watching that video there is not a person alive who should still be on his side. Even Jim Carey realises it! That's right. If your not with us, your against us, and you will be dealt with in exactly the same way that he will be. Once we're done with him, we can go after Jerry Bruckheimer. Some of his films really get on my tits.

Labels: , , , , ,

well said,,,applause...I'm with you

I already didn't like CSI, but CSI Miami with Caruso was like poison to me.

that was great! i despise him as well...with every fibre of my being!!
and now after seeing that u tube video... or should i say, after recovering from it;i think i'm still a bit ill.... but ugh. why did they even keep him on the show? good lord. you'd think they'd have killed him off after the first couple of shows. blah.

but very funny post!

Oh that was totally brilliant!
The only reason I tune in to CSI: Miami is to watch the Horatio buttoners in the opening scene.
He is ginger-vitis and wooden acting at it's worst, but he is almost an art form!!

The first video was hilarious, but I couldn't watch more than 5 of his corny one-liners. Caruso has been the bane of my existence since he was on NYPD Blue. I've never heard such a bad actor on television. What a twat!

Wow, looks like I've brought us all together with our hatred of a total tool! I'm glad you all share my feelings and that I'm not alone in my mission to see Caruso die in a horribly painful and drawn out fashion.

you forgot to mention his three-quarter profile and jacket acting. I HATE THIS MAN!!!

YES!!! the three-quarter profile while the cocks his stupid neck and uses that absurd acting voice. Then he'll shift to his opposite profile and finish the line. The fact that he's still on tv should be the lead story on the evening news of every major network. That's how incredible it is! Thanks for letting me vent.

Love the article... Great stuff!

David Caruso's only good acting was as "Kit Kat" in Hudson Hawk. Personally, any role that does not require David to speak, is an excellent role for him.

As time moves on, he will be thought of in the same genre as William Shatner.

How I understand you...! It´s umbeareble...! He should simply not be aloud to appear on TV let alone acting...!

I AM NOT ALONE! my god the patronising lines the sunglass moves and the matronly condescending hands on hips AAAAGH! I CAN NO LONGER STAND IT! has there ever been any other actor less worthy of a spot in our homes? i have to remove a layer of smarmy slime off my t.v. screen after every episode i just keep watching in the hope that one of the coactors will finally snap and stick his sunglasses up his arse (i am not usually the kind of person who feels this kind of blind rage i blamed the script writers for a while but strongly believe he hero adlibs!!!)and yes he plays the same character in every film he's ruined too!.recently there was an all new hate session i had ignored the show for months, i could only vent at the poor telly for so long,when the previews for the death of horatio came on ....my god the wave of relief the joy was unexpressable! those utter sods i was forced to sit through it only to realise that it was a ploy!!!thinking about it now that episode probably had the highest rating of all the series combined he was probably sitting in his undeserved ginger mansion rubbing his girly freckled palms together not realising that the only reason was we want him gone ,gone ,gone! not that we would miss his sorry arse

haha, your post describes exactly what i've been shouting to the tv many times over when CSI:Miami is on and i cant find the remote.

David Caruso, just die already.

I used to be a fan of CSI Miami - that is until I reached the age of reason and couldn't put up with David Caruso anymore. I hate his acting with a passion. I truly believe that he went to the William Shatner School For Over Actors and is a card carrying member of The Screen Over-Actors Guild of America. Oh, how I wish they would kill him off of the show so I could return to watching CSI Miami.

im with you guys i cant stand him even the sound of his voice makes me want to punch something

You know, he was so much more likable in the first season of NYPD Blue (1993). I liked him so much in that series, that I tried an episode of CSI Miami (a show I had never watched, for some reason) and couldn't believe the horrible transformation. Okay, so he was no longer young and cute, that's true...but I mean, he was no longer LIKABLE...at ALL! What's with the overly squinty eyes? Awful! Nothing he says seems "real" or "believable!" He should have stuck with NYPD Blue!

Post a Comment

About me

  • I'm Ugly Toy
  • From York, N Yorkshire, United Kingdom
  • I'm not that interesting, I just write here
My profile | Email me

 Subscribe to this blog

 
Powered by FeedBurner


Urban Word of the Day

Blogs I Read

Add to Technorati Favorites Hot or Not

Humor blogs Top Blogs

Humor Blogs Humor Blogs

Humor Blogs - Blog Top Sites Top Humor blogs

British Blog Directory. 

 

Humor-Blogs.com

Blogarama - The Blog Directory

eXTReMe Tracker