I'm going to Hell

I've only ever been stopped by the police once for something that I've done wrong. The rest of the time I just happened to be nearby or they were trying to be helpful. I can sympathise with people who don't know what to say, and I can't quite master the art of getting out of stuff, so I just keep my mouth shut and go along with it.

Some people prefer to try and protest their innocence. Generally when you try and get out of stuff, it's minor, like driving just over the speed limit, or littering, but some geniuses try and talk their way out of some serious trouble. I can also see the logic in that, but if I was going to attempt that, I definately would not use any of the following lines:

1. "I thought it was a regular brownie."
2. "I thought the cop was a prostitute."
3. "I just put my junk a little bit of the way in."
4. "The bitch ain't even dead."
5. "I just dropped my truck off in the desert for 15 minutes. By the time I came back, someone must have accidently loaded 250 kilos in it."

I could've included the classic 'It's not mine', which has actually worked for me a few times in the past, but isn't quite as inventive as 'The bitch ain't even dead'. I wish I'd thought of that one at the time.

Tags: Police, Defence, Stupid