Top 5 Situations where it's impossible to look cool
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But there are situations in which even the coolest amongst us can find themselves stretched, where even the most manly of men struggle to maintain the facade, where even Chuck Norris himself flinches in the face of what is to come. Here are my Top 5:
1. Waiting for your girlfriend near a changing room
2. Tripping on anything, especially the pavement
3. Getting on an escalator
4. Putting on a condom
5. Walking down a moving bus
The bus is the worst for normal men. You are completely at the mercy of the driver, so you better pray he's nice. Chuck Norris is so cool because he can avoid most of these problems. If Chuck Norris had to wait for his girlfriend, he'd kill her, if he caught his foot on anything, he'd destroy it, he could jump higher than any escalator and run faster and longer than any bus. And there's not a condom in existence that could hold Chuck Norris's sperm.